The Albino Bamboo

I should not be given anything that counts on me to sustain it's life.
I have this bamboo plant that has been alive for about 5 years. The story is that my sister Lisa moved away to England leaving the young and growing charge in my care.
The only thing the bamboo needs is water every month or so. Yes, every MONTH or so. Which means my responsibilities center upon remembering 12 or less times a year to transport the plant to my bathroom, fill it's glass vase with water and watch it live on.
The other day I got the idea that, despite the fact that it has been doing fine without sunlight for the last half decade, it probably would like a chance to flex it's chlorophyll power. Transporting it outside, I left it for a few hours (ok, 2 days) to gather some rays. When I come back, the bamboo is... well, it's...white. Completely white. My beautiful green bamboo has become albino.

The evidence would force us to deduce that I am the cause of all the recent plant murders at my house. My sister hopes I never have kids because I would probably treat them the same as I treat my plants. I.e. The novalty wears off and neglect settles in causing either desease or decay... When the sad scene becomes an embarassment to my homemaking skills, I take my mostly dead plant/ child over to my mother's lush garden/ home and place it somewhere inconspicuous so she will think that it was her plant/ child that she forgot about and adopt it into her care.

I should never be given anything alive.